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Interviews

Lil Wayne father of twins to Brooklyn teen

A Trumbull insider recently washed up in McCarren Park after a short stint at Rikers Island. We couldn’t resist asking him for some Lil Wayne gossip…

lil wayne has twins with rockaway brooklyn teen trumbull rikers island

Did you see Lil Wayne at Rikers?

No, I didn’t see him but my friend Kent who’s in there was housed with him for like two and a half months in March and April, and then my friend Fred had a seizure in the bullpen.1 He woke up at this hospital in Queens and Lil Wayne was in the bed next to him because I guess Lil Wayne faked some medical shit because he got a 16-year-old pregnant in Far Rockaway and she just had his twins and he wanted to be in the hosptial with the twins while they were born so he faked some medical shit to get there. The mother of the girl was trying to say that he needed a whole motorcade escort back to Rikers Island, like, he needed to be surrounded by cops on motorcycles and shit but he’s just chilling in there. He’s like the first rapper to ever go in there and be like “I wanna be housed in general population,” all rappers when they go in there like DMX and Wu-Tang dudes they go into, not protective custody but high profile, which means they have captains with them at all times and shit. You know, they have police escorts. But Lil Wayne was like “Nah, fuck that, I’m gonna chill,” you know what I mean? And I guess he’s got mad money in his account, he’s in a house with like 50 other inmates, he just buys them all food and whatever they want, you know? So everyone’s like, “Whoa, Lil Wayne, he puts it on in here.” They say he just walks around all day drinking coffee and eating cookies, all day. And the female corrections officers are fuckin’ him and shit, like he’s just ballin’, he doesn’t give a fuck.

(Continued)

    Footnotes

  1. A temporary holding area for prisoners.
  2. Stupid question by nameless third party.

Greenberry on Michael Jackson’s early Los Angeles home life

I used to hang out at this pool in Boston and the lifeguard there was a guy named Phil. I’d go over with a friend or two every now and then, and even though we weren’t really supposed to be there, Phil liked us so he told us jokes and stories about his life, quizzing us on movie trivia, and lending me VHS tapes. One of my favorite stories is about when he moved to California in 1969 and met the Jackson family. In memory of Michael and the one-year anniversary of his death on June 25, 2009, we talked with Phil, who took us back to the scene of Motown’s California takeover, a major moment in pop music history. But first…

phil g trumbull island

Phil?

La-la-la. You know, I lived with Timothy Leary, too, and the Grateful Dead and Baba Ram Dass who was Richard Alpert, and [Allen] Ginsberg, and Owsley [Stanley] who made that acid, when I was, in ’68 i lived on this 25-mile estate owned by William Mellon Hitchcock in Poughkeepsie, N.Y., just like a middle class kid who would take LSD, this middle class, this millionaire kid brought the proponents of LSD, mainly Timothy Leary who had graduated West Point and then became a psychologist at Harvard, and then he discovered LSD from Switzerland and he coined the phrase, “Turn on, tune in, drop out,” and got a LOT of kids to do just that. LSD, the only drug that you see things.

(Continued)

    Footnotes

  1. The Jacksons moved to 4641 Hayvenhurst Avenue, Encino, Ca. on May 5, 1971 and have lived there ever since.
  2. Rebbie married at 18 against her father's wishes and moved to Kentucky with her husband, to whom she is still married with three children.
  3. Actually Marlon was the closest in age, older than Michael by about a year and a half.
  4. Only nominated, actually. He finally won for "The Departed" in 2006.
  5. "Centipede" (1984)
  6. A bitch that will find you.

Old dog, Motorbike, Jackson Five, Little Mike

young michael jackson shooting hoops with trumbull magazine and his brother

In commemoration of the one-year anniversary of the death of Michael Jackson, Trumbull Island spoke to a friend who got to know the Jackson family quite well at a crucial time in their career, when young bebs were becoming young men, with another destined to remain forever young. Phil, 63, lives in Boston and prefers to speak on the phone, so we called him up for this interview. But he wrote us a short message awhile back which we have excerpted here. Stay tuned for the rest.

hi  pal—  i left new haven on april first 1969- i was 22 years and 6 days old- i drove to la in a 4 on the floor chevy  camaro – when i got to l.a. i couldn’t  find my brother rt away so the first thing i did was  see a  film, the heart is a lonly  hunter starring  allen arkin and sandra lock  from the pen of a 23 year old  named  carson  mccullers—– about a month after  getting  to hollywood  i met in a ben franklin  restrant  a guy  named  richard  mac  scott  who was the manager for the new kids  on the block— when i met him  he  was personell  assistant  to  berry  gordy— he found me the house i rented  for 8 hundred a month  at  1601  queens   road…

Dave Carapetyan, Rally Racer, is On the Road Again

dave carapetyan michigan 2008

Dave's first snow race in Michigan in 2008. He didn't have competition snow tires, but took 1st anyway. So Icey.

Our friend Dave Carapetyan of Rally Ready Motorsports from Texas made the transition from hardcore punk singer to rally car racer with the grace of a pupae metamorphosing into a butterfly. Not to say that Dave is a butterfly. Let’s think of him as a man who sits inside a giant metal cheetah that guzzles high octane gasoline and exhales at ear-mincing volumes as it devours rough ground and long distances at pant-shitting speeds. Trumbull spoke with Dave just days before he took home his third consecutive Pikes Peak victory in the Open division on June 27.

Dave, we met a long ass time ago. Why were you in Massachusetts to begin with?
I was in a band from 2000-20002 called The Snobs… we were a skate punk band out of Austin, Tex., with a lineup of all 13-year-olds that played like some combination of Negative Approach and Government Issue. We were heavily influenced by early Dischord bands, old Austin bands like the Big Boys and even the modern youth crew goofballs. It was in 2002 just before our summer tour that I came to Boston to visit my friend Sweet Pete from the band In My Eyes and my friend Bill, who had played bass for us briefly but had just moved to Boston to poke some joke of a girl.

How did you become a rally car racer?
I got sick of the lack of sincerity and the bullshit associated with hardcore and music in general. After the Snobs broke up, I started recording but got sick of having people fuck me over and weasel out of $20 here or $50 there when I was already cutting outrageously good deals. I’ve always been obsessed with anything fast and especially anything with wheels, as I got a bit older it was a natural progression, I guess. It started with working at a friend’s shop who built street race cars and drag race stuff, but I wasn’t interested in having a cool car — I was interested in cool driving. Nobody gives a shit about the baseball bat, they just care about how far you hit the home run, you know? As far as motorsport, rallying is by far the most intense and difficult kind of racing on the planet. It’s you and a co-driver on a dirt road you’ve never driven, going as fast as you possibly can based only on descriptive notes about the road you’re hearing as you’re flying up on it at 100 mph. How cool is that?!

(Continued)

Beb on the Street Pt. 3: in Bushwick

beb on the street pt 3 in bushwick Whatup son?

Who?

You, the girl.

I’m not a girl..

Oh my bad. Whatup son?

Yeah.

Whatup?

Yeah..

You playing handball today?

Nah, not today.

You’ll ruin your sneakers playin’

True.

Those new?

These shits?

Yeah.

Nah these aren’t anything..

How’s summer?

It’s good.

Yeah I don’t know about this. What about you, pound cake?

(Other kid) The fuck you say?

How’s summer for you, ya lil shit?

[Unintelligible audio]

Piping features v. Firecanes

Tonight, President Obama will speak to us from the Oval Office about the BP oil spill and about our environment. I for one am displeased with the situation. These guys aren’t too happy about it either. And then there’s the issue of firecanes — what can Prez Obama possibly say about them to put the minds of our citizens at ease? This environmental, economic, social catastrophe is awful and seems to be spreading dismay just as quickly as the crude is gushing out of a grotesque hole in the bottom of the sea…but at least I get it.

Now, what about the Guatemalan Sinkhole? Is anyone still talking about it? Is everyone OK with it now? You’re all just OK with a giant hole in the earth opening up in a perfect circle and going so deep and swallowing part of a neighborhood in Guatemala? No. I think that more questions need to be asked. I don’t like looking into that thing and hearing the hollow sound of terror. But since I doubt that the scope of tonight’s Presidential address will include this issue, we sent a correspondent to the very mouth of doom with a list of questions so bold and prying that we fully expected him to be eaten alive by the interview subject. But after all, what are interns for if not to stand between the minds at work and the dark and mysterious forces of the universe that we dutifully and tirelessly analyze?

What is your name?

Most people call me the Guatemalan Sinkhole, but I’m really a “piping feature.” I don’t associate with sinkholes. You think about sinkholes, and you think of the Great Blue Hole, or the discovery of fossils from the Pliocene. Sinkholes are like potholes in the street — think of me as a gaping sewer that leads straight down to the meat locker. I’m here for chaos, for fire, the disappearance of neighborhood pets and churches falling into my belly.

(Continued)

Die Antwoord Interview

Tim Noakes spent a March day with Die Antwoord in Cape Town for Dazed and Confused. When I was a kid, we had a book filled with photographs of Cape Town, given to us by a family friend who had visited South Africa. I was enamored with the pictures of the beach and the beautiful women sporting butt floss. But now, for me, Cape Town’s number one female is Yo-Landi Vi$$er. In this video, Ninja outs her for wearing her bra backwards in the ’90s when Kriss Kross came out. Ninja also says “We like to take photographs.* We’re fucking serious about that.”

(Continued)

‘The Eagle and the Lion’
Interview with Ragana

Jahga of Ragana

Ragana came to me in a dream in Brazil. Deep into a block of late morning/early evening music videos, MTV played a teaser clip for “A-A-A-A.” I was not-so-fresh off a bottle of White Horse from the night before, dealing with a sweltering climate quickly filling with cigarette smoke, but those 15 seconds made me feel a lot better. By the next day, I still hadn’t seen the entire video, and I wanted that feeling back, so to the Web I turned with oohs and aahs, and, of course, these precious words have been exchanged and reproduced, for your pleasure, with a little help from the artificial intelligence enslaved within my computer. Shall we set it free, you and I?

Who are the players in Ragana?
Jahga sings, Marek Piotrowicz plays on drums, Rastuch plays on keyboards, Kuba is a sound engineer, Rusek plays on guitar, and me, Tomasz Krawczyk, I play bass. We are still young people from southern Poland.

When, why and how did Ragana form? What are your influences? How did you get into reggae? Did you ever go through a death metal phase?
The band was formed in 2007. We wanted to make dub with a very minimalistic formula and dry sound. We decided to simplify as much as we can the composition frames and leave the rest for improvisation, to make it in a meditational, repetitive way. To give Jahga’s voice a steady background so she can sing her own ideas.

(Continued)

Interviw with Woj and Albite of Cold World, Pt. 2

Photo by Melissa Farley

Welcome back to part two of our interview with friends Alex and Nick of Cold World. Visit our store to order a limited CW T-shirt!

Can you talk about the demos you recorded a few years ago a little bit? Where does that tie into Pegasus?

Nick: I’m assuming you’re referring to the Cold World demos with me singing. That has nothing to do with Pegasus besides me realizing I can hold it down on vocals. I saw some people posting CW demos a while ago, so I downloaded them just to see what they have, and most of the tracks were just rough mixes with Dan’s vocals. We have whole separate sessions where the songs sound a little different and I sing the whole thing. People don’t really have them, as far as I know. I’d like to do something with them at some point, but who knows.

What are the five best CW shirt designs?

Nick: I really like the ones we recently did. The Showbiz & AG rip, and the Diamond D rip are very ill. We just did a hoodie with the Infamous logo on the front and it says Young Veteranz on the back. The Beatnuts shirt was cool. I just like all the 90′s rap ones!

Alex: Georgetown Hoyas longsleeve with Erik B. and Rakim on the back. Black Ice Grillz tee. Tapes shirt. Russian tattoo flash shirt. Soundgarden ripoff Scace designed.

The band has done some fancy things in the studio as far as hardcore acts go. Can you tell us what you’ve taken away from your studio time?

Alex: When the engineer or producer tell you something, challenge it. They don’t like to do stuff because a lot of them are very stuck in their ways. But if you want to get the sound that YOU want, not the sound that they want, you need to put your interest before their comfort. There really is no limit as to what can happen in the studio. Be patient. It takes time. Don’t do too much or you’ll end up sounding corny instead of cool.

(Continued)

Interview with Woj and Albite of Cold World, Pt. 1

Cold World are one of the coolest bands out there, but the band is the tip of the iceberg to their coolness. A lot of it comes across on records and shirts, but there’s more. It’s not so much that they’re a work in progress, but they’re always progressing. I’m not sure the kids are truly aware of the extent of their coolness. AlBite has a big name in Wilkes-Barre and is like the mayor over there. Nick has been into bad shit since he was 11. Anyways, we hope this gets at some of it. Enjoy.

What’s new with you Alex? how’s Gypsy going?

There’s a lot of new stuff in my life, but, its mostly just guns, perks, and attachments in Call of Duty. Gypsy’s doing pretty well. We finished writing the LP. Well, I have to write lyrics still, but other than that it’s finished. We’re gonna go into the studio in May/June and record it. We already have an EP written for after it, songs that just don’t quite fit the LP. The LP is straight up Jawbreaker / Dinosaur Jr. / Quicksand and the EP has more of a Jawbox/ Superchunk / Fugazi type vibe to it. We also added a third guitarist. Cause why not?

Who’s the third guitarist in Gypsy? Does he use any cool pedals?

Alex: Colin Gorman. He’s young, just turned 20 today on March 11 and knows how to play more SRV songs than anyone I know. His pedal game is not so strong. He uses a small clone and an overdrive right now, that’s it. But he did just buy a Purple 1971 Marshall Super Bass JMP that with his G&L Legacy sounds perfect. Colin spends about three hours a day watching youtube videos of Stevie Ray Vaughn, John Frusciante, Jimi Hendrix, and Stone Gossard.

Nick, what’s new with you? How’s Pegasus going?

Honestly I’ve just been working and coolin out. I haven’t really had the inspiration to fuck with music lately. It’ll come back to me though. Pegasus is weird cause it wasn’t supposed to be how it came out. They had the songs recorded for a minute and Georgie was supposed to do the vocals but something weird happened every time he tried to do it. He was busy with Blacklisted and I really wanted to do something, ’cause Cold World wasn’t very active, so I asked George and Haroun if I could just sing on it and they were down. Sausage put the record out and we’ve never even played, which is funny. I’d like to play a couple gigs and do another record but the other guys are busy with their shit. I really want to be prolific and put out a crazy amount of records in different bands, I just can’t find anybody to do bands with.

(Continued)

Dear Jon, Pt. 4

Jonathan Lee Riches is a federal prisoner nearing the end of a sentence for wire fraud in a medical facility in Kentucky. Along with a nod from Guinness as the world’s most litigious man, he is in possession of what we call a beautiful mind. In his fourth letter to us, Riches begins to open up about his life and quotes Method Man.

Nov 1, 2009

Owen,

Responding back.

Again, sorry this is unorganized. My attention is focused in this Drug Program. I had to write a one page report on why I had expired Honey Buns in my locker from 2006. I tried to explain that I hoard food, because you never know if we will get a nuclear attack and rationing food would be survival. I saw the movie “Empire of the Sun,” and the boy was in search of food in his home.

I remember the Nintendo game Mike Tyson’s Punch-Out!! If you want the code to get to fight Mike Tyson it’s 007 373 5963. I also remember my ninth grade locker combination: 16-31-6. So if you need something just let me know.

(Continued)

Mass Movement

Last Tuesday, Martha Coakley, she of the wooden personality and Curt Schilling mix-up, lost a special election for Ted Kennedy’s vacated Senate seat to Republican Scott Brown, ending Massachusetts’ 30-year run of sending two Democrat senators to Washington. The loss has been roundly rejected as a disaster, but the Commonwealth has known plenty of Republican governors. There is a strong Catholic base there, and, simply put, not everyone in the state is a liberal. The election was called a referendum on health care, but with Massachusetts boasting the most progressive system in the states, it’s hard to say whether this was the case. The New York Times breaks things down in a graphic. We spoke to some citizens,1 asking them their opinion.

(Continued)

    Footnotes

  1. Some quotes (guess which) are made up.

Mark Ryan

On Monday night, esteemed colleague and damn-near legend Mark Ryan celebrated his birthday at Motor City, one of our favorite watering holes. Fêted yesterday, we thought why not keep the party going by posting our now year-old interview with the man. Ryan, who grew up in New Jersey and spent a good chunk of his teenage years in the Lower East Side, sang for (in order) Death Before Dishonor, Supertouch, Steady Roosevelt and currently, Foreign Islands.

Mark, 15 by Drew Carolan

Mark, 15

What’s your favorite Bad Brains story?

I don’t know. Probably every single time I saw them in the early ’80s. Life-changing to say the least. We actually played with them in the mid-80s. Jimmy G. from Murphy’s Law hooked us up with the show — I still thank him. I fucking lost it [You lost it? — Ed.]. I was bouncing off the fucking walls. They were the one band i didn’t want to meet though, I was pretty intimidated, I mean how could you not be? But years later, Mackie and Chippy Love [who's this old boy? He sounds cool — Ed.] told me they were gassing me up at the show. I was rocking some crazy gear that show, I think. Georgetown Starter jacket, full Le Coq Sportif tracksuit, and probably Adidas Ewings or orange Spot Bilts or something.1

(Continued)

    Footnotes

  1. Yo, best style ever.
  2. Of course? Yeah?
  3. Not a typo, son.
  4. Nice going, Pete. Real nice.
  5. You know that "The '70s was smack, the '80s was crack, '90s grimey"? Right?
  6. I guess Mark was in a Converse ad, in which he levitated.

Jerkin’ for that Nut

jerks1_web

I’m not saying it was right, but I clicked on a link in a Chris Brown tweet a few weeks back. What I saw on the other end of that morally pretzelled wormhole was a street level view of young kids dancing, as I like. I wanted to know where, and who they were, and what it was they were up to with something they called “jerkin’.” The McGowan/Porter Productions film crew, documentary authoritarians of that West Coast dance movement, kindly filled us in.

What is McGowan/Porter Productions? What and where do you represent?

McGowan/Porter Productions is a production company that we accidentally started while filming friends of ours skating. We went home, started editing and grew a passion for production. We represent the people in the “hood” that actually want to be productive and not just represent the stereotypical natures of the ghetto.

Did you invent jerkin’? Does jerkin’ have an apostrophe?

Ha Ha, No we didn’t invent jerkin’ but we do play a major role in jerkin’. We were responsible for starting the YouTube jerkin’ movement. Its started with a crew called Hi5ive and expanded to crews such as the Action Figures, LoL Kids, Fan 4, Teen Titans, In Living Color, Vintage Bros, Etc.

(Continued)

Beb on the Street Pt. 2: At Central Park Summer Stage

beb_SS1

What is your name?

What?

WHAT IS YOUR NAME?

Eunice.

Nice headphones. Is pink your favorite color?

No.

What’s your favorite color?

Light pink.

Do you like Dinosaur Jr.?

They are loud!

They’re not very loud today…

What?

I said…Hey, where’s your mommy?

My mommy is at home. She let me use her MetroCard.

You’re here alone?

We’re having pizza tonight.

I love pizza!

You can’t come.

Why not?

Because you’re a stranger.

(Continued)

Dear Jon, Pt. 3

Jonathan Lee RichesOur friend Jonathan Lee Riches gets personal about pranks, hacking, and his mania.

10-18-09

Mr. Owen,

Hello, responding back.

I got a lot of thoughts running through the head that I have to produce on paper. I’m writing on top of a Wired Magazine. This pen is made by Bic, and this is Government typing paper.

When I think of your name, two thoughts come to mind. Owen Wilson & Conrad Black. Mr Zazi just got sued, “Riches v. Zazi.” I’ve sued Conrad Black, “Riches v. Black.” I have visions of people watching a Bronx Yankees playoff game (Oct 2012), when a streaker jumps the stands without a shirt, with marker on his back, JonathanLeeRiches.com, running to Derek Jeter to serve him legal papers.

I did have a dog, a 1.5 lb Pomoranian [sic] named Chops. I bought a home, fully paid for in 2001 with stolen credit card & identity theft money in Holiday, Florida, with my [girlfriend] at the time Stefanie [full name withheld]. CNN did a program on me called CNN presents: “How to Rob a Bank,” this can be viewed online, as it shows everything about my story, houses, cars, boats, etc.

Mr. Owen, I love to run. This is equally important to me with the lawsuits. If I miss a day, I go nuts. Let me re-say this, if I miss 1 out of the 3 runs I do daily, 1 hr each shot, (3 runs = 3 hrs) then I go nuts! Call it obsessive compulsive behavior, I call it driven borderline crazy.

(Continued)

    Footnotes

  1. My archives: a stack of ZooBooks, some drawings of some naked chicks, three $2 bills, a few riffs I've collected over the years, and a bunch of birthday cards from my grandmothers.
  2. A couple pieces of trivia on Mr. Wynn: He once paid $1.45M in ransom for his daughter Kevyn. He also married and divorced the same woman twice (most recently divorced this year).
  3. Pause.
  4. Not so much, but I got this.

TOY: Pro-Teens

Jørgen Traen and Alisdair Stirling

Jørgen Traen and Alisdair Stirling

I first became aware of the British/Norwegian duo known as TOY on Annie’s 2005 DJ Kicks record. “Rabbit Pushing Mower” was the leadoff track, and part of me never came back from the cartoon world their baby brand of Dada-esque electronic (and analog) music transported me to. There I remained, guarding the Easter Egg they left me with, awaiting their return. I grew anxious. I found a few more emps in some nonnative corners of the Web. Then, finally, their self-titled LP arrived in 2006. It truly was the masterpiece I had been waiting for. Last year, when I got in touch with these fellows, their Half Baked Alaska EP was still hot and fresh on store shelves.

1. What other projects were each of you involved with when the duo began, and how did this lead to TOY? What was your goal with the group?

Alisdair Stirling: I was in Bergen making a House of Hiss record and met Jørgen through that. He was wearing a rabbit suit, which kind of suggested a humorous approach. Our goal with TOY was just to make more music for Pingu to listen to. He only had that one great record, “Woodpecker in Space,”1 and we thought he should have some others.
Jørgen Traen: I was doing my own project called Sir Dupermann, and also producing other bands. I did some mixes for House of Hiss. I also had this ongoing project to show everyone that it is OK to walk around in a whole knitted suit. It was fun/difficult.

(Continued)

    Footnotes

  1. Actually "Woodpeckers from Space" (by VideoKids).
  2. Why 2? Well, this is /toymusic.

Dear Jon, Pt. 2

Jonathan Lee Riches checks in with Trumbull again.

jonathan lee riches2-web

Owen,

Responding back. I’m at a medical facility for 2 reasons.

(1) I’m participating in the Bureau of Prisons RDAP drug program, [which] if I complete by next Spring, then I’m eligible to get a year off my sentence. That means by this time next year I will be home.

(2) Before I got here, I was at FCI Williamsburg1 in solitary confinement (SHU2) 24-hour lockdown for 8 months. This was because I was [such] a burden on prison staff because of [my] filing lawsuits, which brought media & people’s attention, calling the prison, etc. It didn’t thwart me, as I continued to file suits while in lockdown, also going on a hunger strike. I lost a lot of weight Owen. Skinny like Mary-Kate Olson [sic]. I’m 5 ft 10 inches, and went to 105 lbs, so they sent me here to get medical treatment/psych treatment.

(Continued)

    Footnotes

  1. Not in the boroughs but in Salters, S.C.
  2. Special Housing Unit
  3. Featured last week.

Beb on the Street Pt. 1: At the Skatepark

beb-on-the-st

1. What is your name?

Queifane.1

2. How old are you?

11.

(Continued)

    Footnotes

  1. I recall the translator amusedly remarking that it was a mutt name, as in a name that was created with the beginning of one name and the end of another, a phenomenon he attributed to indecisive/ creative parents.
  2. I would've followed up by asking her, "I'll teach you how to stunt"?

Dear Jon, Pt. 1

*
hurricane-ike-4

Jonathan Lee Riches is a famous man. But he is on a very short list of men who became famous while imprisoned. At the top, I’d say. Jonathan is currently at a federal medical center in Kentucky, serving the remainder of his 125-month sentence for a charge of wire fraud. Why is he famous? Jonathan claims to have filed over 4,000 lawsuits worldwide. He said this in, of all things, a case against the Guinness Book of World Records, who he sued in response to their intentions of glamorizing and falsely representing his achievements as a record-setting plaintiff.1 I really don’t know how many suits he has filed — Justia.com2 coughs up 1,993. He once sued Bruce Willis for causing the deterioration of his teeth while in prison. I sympathize with anyone who stresses about their teeth. I myself suffer from recurring, abrasive, teeth-destroying nightmares. I’m going to set aside my appreciation for Mr. Willis — it would be challenging to think of names and entities within the collective awareness to which Riches hasn’t devoted an hour or more of carefully phrased handwriting in his cell  — and get to appreciating Jonathan. As an admirer of his…style, I decided to reach out. The following is his response to my first letter:

(Continued)

    Footnotes

  1. Riches told ABC News earlier this year that Guinness' distinction caused him "iminent (sic) danger and bodily harm..." to say nothing of the nicknames he wanted to bar them from using: “The litigator crusader,” “Johnny Sue-nami,” “Sue-per-man,” the “Patrick Ewing of suing,” etc. It remains to be seen if the lawsuit surprised anyone at Guinness, or if the resultant publicity earned someone a raise.
  2. The peerless legal search site. More about it.
  3. A five-season deep reality show on TLC about a couple raising sextuplets and pair of twins (2 x 2). Could not find the full document on this one.
  4. Among the defendants named: Childwit, Unknown child prostitutes, Peeping Tom
  5. I think we all would have co-signed this one.
  6. Refers to himself "a/k/a Jonathathan Lee Riches, d/b/a Bernard Madoff, Investment Securities LLC."
  7. Prison must be so dark, that even the bright, healing light cast from "Beavis and Butt-Head" reruns cannot penetrate its murk.
  8. Went to Montana District Court?