You wake up on Friday and you wonder, WTF happened this week. We’re here to tell you. We weren’t really paying attention either, but the data that really matters is the data that finds you.
Last Laughs: Sotheby’s sold some of Lord Byron’s unreleased freestyles for $455,000. He comes at Williams Wordsworth (“Turdsworth”) and the Portuguese in terms unfit to reprint here.
Hot Trax: Lady Gaga dropped the video for “Bad Romance.” Gucci Mane violated probation somehow and was promptly handed a 12-month bid. The Real Cam’ron announced his new single. BANE’s new 7″ is spinning on Brian Murphy’s turntable. Nicki Minaj has been hot all over a bunch of tracks, but if you want to understand anything she’s talking about, the Nictionary might help. Standout entry:
Barbie Juice : \bär-bē-jüs\ : noun
1: ice cold pickle juice in a glass that barbies drink to experience a sudden blast of EUPHORIA.
Does Nicki know about Grillo’s Pickles?
Plus/Minus: Either hyper-update or erase yourself completely, no more of this not answering emails crap, says Wally.
The Sporting Life:1 Tom Tango is pretty dry, while Stan Van Gundy is pretty relax. I’m pretty relaxed about Bill Simmons, the Sports Guy, but Charles P. Pierce, noted Masshole, and Slate contributor, administers the hottest ethering I’ve seen since I saw this last night. Oh, and Google? I C What U Did There.
Until next week …
- Shootout to Diamanda.