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Jonathan Lee Riches v. Lady GaGa, Octomom

jonathan lee riches v lady gaga octomom trumbull island stefani germanotta

Trumbull Island has discovered that one of the hottest jams of 2008-2009, Lady GaGa’s “Poker Face,” has quite an interesting story in its provenance. It seems that our friend Jonathan Lee Riches © had a hand in the penning of this number one hit. In a lawsuit dated March 29, 2010, Jonathan unfurls an account of how GaGa, “star struck” upon recognizing Jonathan at the MGM Grand in July 2002, took action against him after giving her the idea for her second big single:

Stefani Germanotta sat next to me and asked “Excuse me, are those Bugle Boy jeans your [sic] wearing.” …I said “Look lady, can’t you see I got a poker face, I’m trying to concentrate.” She then said “Poker face, I’m going to use that in a song of mine one day.”

Continue reading for the entire text of the suit, as well as the original PDF.
Riches v. Germanotta et al PDF

IN THE UNITED STATES DISTRICT COURT
FOR THE DISTRICT OF OREGON

Case No: 6:2010cv06074

Jonathan Lee Riches d/b/a
Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab a/k/a
Bernard Madoff,
Plaintiff
v.
Stefani Germanotta a/k/a Lady Gaga;
Nadya Suleman a/k/a Octomom,
Defendants

[Preliminary Injunction, Temporary Restraining Order]
TRO

Comes now, Jonathan Lee Riches d/b/a Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab a/k/a Bernard Madoff, moves this honorable court to issue a restraining order against Stefani Germanotta a/k/a Lady GaGa and Nadya Suleman a/k/a OctoMom because I face imminent danger and bodily harm from them, they want to kill me because I know secrets on them that has never been revealed to the world and I plan to write a tell all book called: “Snitches, I’m Jonathan Lee Riches.” I will tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth against the defendants illegal acts of manipulation, deceit, cunning, lip singing, abortions, etc. I met defendant Stefani Germanotta in July 2002 at a poker table at MGM Casino in Las Vegas. I was in town attending Defcon’s annual Black Hat hacker convention where I gave a public demonstration on how to commit identity fraud, computer hacking, phishing, and spamming, where I received $52,000 at a Kroger grocery store Western Union. I then spent my money lavishly around Las Vegas. I was at a poker table where Stefani Germanotta sat next to me and asked “Excuse me, are those Bugle Boy jeans your [sic] wearing.” I did not respond then Germanotta told me she knew me from being a Internet celebrity all over Google and Wikipedia. Google “Jonathan Lee Riches.” She said she heard about me having the Guinness Book of World Records for suing the most people in the history of mankind and then she asked for my autograph on her breast. I said “Look lady, can’t you see I got a poker face, I’m trying to concentrate” she then said “Poker face, I’m going to use that in a song of mine one day.” I was practicing playing poker so I could enter the World Series of Poker each year. The year before I used stolen identity theft money from each of the Dixie Chicks to enter, but I lost because I had a hernia and I could not concentrate, so this time I had my “poker face” game look on and defendant Germanotta kept distracting me and harassing me. She said I smelled so good with Calvin Klein, she also sexually fondled me under the poker table which ruined my royal flush. Then I was drinking Red Bull, and Germanotta slipped me the date rape pill and ecstasy and before I knew it I was passed out. I woke up 4 hours later at the penthouse suite at Trump’s casino in bed with defendant Germanotta and her best friend defendant Nadya Suleman. I was used, abused, and sexually assaulted and insulted by both of them. Defendant Suleman forced me to get her pregnant while Germanotta filmed it with a camcorder. Now the defendants both have been distributing this material online, on YouTube, and adult book stores. In early 2003, Germanotta forced me to do wardrobes and outfits she is currently wearing on tour. I used P-Ditty [sic] Combs’ stolen CitiBank credit card to get Germanotta breast implants, her hair extensions, DJ equipment, lipo around her tummy, and for her gall bladder surgery totaling $126,000. I then was forced at gunpoint by Germanotta to rob banks using fake IDs and credit cards to pay for her best friend defendant Nadya Suleman’s 8 baby cribs, pampers, slinkys [sic], Gerber baby food. This was also filmed. I was featured in a CNN documentary titled “CNN presents: How to Rob a Bank,” this can be viewed online. If you watch close you can see Germanotta pointing a 9mm at my head. I had no choice, now I’m doing 125 months in prison because of the defendants. On top of that, after I got Suleman pregnant, she then gave my baby boy Maddox away to Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt to adopt. This was theft of my child, I did not authorize this and I compel this court to order my son back to me or at least give me visitation rights. I have evidence on the defendants including their DNA, prison love letters from both of them. Defendant Germanotta has been sending me thousands of dollars on my prison account if I sue her music rivals like Riches v. Timberlake, Riches v. Combs, Riches v. Ludacris, Riches v. Jay-Z, Riches v. Lil Wayne, to put them in debt and embarrass them. I’m now coming clean, I want out of this conspiracy. I just want to get my life back on track without doing crimes for the defendants. They continue to stalk me and are doing everything possible to stop me from whistle blowing in my tell all book. Lady Gaga is not compensating me for giving her the idea of “Poker Face.” Defendants, please leave me be. When I get out of prison I plan to live low key and operate a ice cream truck somewhere in North Dakota. I move for a restraining order to stop this harassment and stalking. I’m so scared of the defendants I get goosebumps when I see them in tabloids, and get anxiety attacks when Lady Gaga sings on the radio, this is disturbing my sentence. I also move this court to compel the FBI to do a investigation on crimes the defendants previously did with me because they are both co-defendants of mine that never been indicted. Check out my criminal case from the Southern District of Texas, case # 4:03-CR-90-2 and I have a eating disorder now because of the stress inflicted on me by the defendants. Look at my picture on the lawsuit Riches v. Hurricane Ike at the end of it has me flexing without a shirt on. I need help and I pray this court will grant my motion for relief.

Respectfully
Jonathan Lee Riches
3-19-10

Jonathan Lee Riches
d/b/a
Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab
a/k/a
Bernard Madoff
#40948018

Federal Medical Center
P.O. Box 14500
Lexington, KY 40512
859-255-6812

54 Comments

  1. blake fox wrote:

    this is completely ridiculous. no ones going to believe you. and please leave nadya suleman alone, she has tons of kids to take care of and no cash. on the other hand gaga is cool but you can sue her, but i still think its wrong to falsy sue gaga or suleman.

    Thursday, July 22, 2010 at 9:14 pm | Permalink
  2. I assume this is a WordPress blog, no? Which plug-ins do you use?

    Monday, September 13, 2010 at 9:03 pm | Permalink
  3. Pamela wrote:

    He should sue Justin Bieber for comparing himself to the legendary kurt cobain

    Friday, March 11, 2011 at 12:36 pm | Permalink
  4. Pamela wrote:

    And i idolize you, man. i know im only 14, but you set my life goals: sue everyone on the face of this planet. and i know what you are doing richy, your basically suing until they say “STOP!” but fact is, they can’t. unless they make the usa unconstitutional .
    I Freaking love you, man.
    Pamela. O_0

    Friday, March 11, 2011 at 12:38 pm | Permalink
  5. JONATHAN LEE RICHES IS A LEGEND

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