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Solie Says

I’m watching Spongebob Squarepants!

What else?

I have no elbow!


Wanna see a picture of my brother?


Nick of Tim: That’s What Friends are for

Nate Turbow is a cartoonist and a DJ living in New York City. Follow him on twitter for updates on the party of life, or if you ever need a little extra motivation to do something awful.

What Dat?

He didn’t get the “American Gangster” soundtrack, but wrote a record anyway. On Sunday, Jay-Z likely missed out on halftime to The Who, but sang a joint anyways. Why not? I would have been more into a classics set from UNLV, but it might be a better idea to save that kind of forward-thinking for a Patriots-Buccaneers Superbowl.


Eye on Freeport Pt. 2

Back for more, are you? Wielding our camera like a rusty machete, we crudely bushwhack further into L.L. Bean’s hunting section to bring you photographic evidence of some very special products. Dog boots, magnum honkers, and a cornucopia of wild animal scents. I bet this girl’s mom is on Bean’s mailing list … where else is she going to find shit to stuff Wolfie’s stocking with for Christmas? We’ve also captured some historical images from the company’s 1912 Cafe. But you don’t have to go back in time to find a good pair of boots — Bean’s Freeport store is open 24/7, no kidding, and they still make ‘em like they used to.1


  1. For the most part. Some products are no longer made in the USA. But that's quibbling...

Eye on Freeport pt. 1

click for slideshow

You know how it is when you’re home, for the holidays, and you just need to get the fuck out of the house?

Welcome to Freeport, Maine, famous for its outlet shopping and being home to the great American outdoor wear and boot manufacturer, L.L. Bean. Freeport is a coastal town in Southern Maine, though its retail center, bisected by Route 1, is not oriented on the waterfront. It is home to the world’s tallest Native American (pictured above) and Joan Benoit Samuelson, the Olympic marathon champion. There is an area of land protected by the Audubon Society called the Mast Landing Bird Sanctuary located just one mile east of downtown Freeport. The preserve is oddly juxtaposed with L.L. Bean, who sells everything you or your dog would ever need to trap, confuse, or assassinate any type of foul that might even consider sticking their beak in Mast Landing. I don’t know why you’d want to do that, though, so just take it easy, man.


Joe Buck: See Tracy Porter…



  1. For other Pacmin...

12 Big Pictures

These screengrabs from the Big 12 championship game likely speak for themselves, so consider the following closed-captioning for our hearing impaired readers.


Halfway through the Big 12 championship game, Texas is ahead. They ran in a touchdown the first half, but aside from that, Longhorns quarterback Colt McCoy didn’t do so well (he threw three picks in the game and sort of loafed the last play, before time was put back on the clock). I wasn’t impressed with much of the football in the early going and it looked like Bevo, even less so.


Gotta Fight the Hard Way

“60 Minutes” ran a story on Sunday about improvised explosive devices (IEDs), or roadside bombs, the deadliest artillery found in Afghanistan, and the elite American squads dedicated to finding and disabling them. The units are known as Task Force Paladin, and their job is so crazy that the only way to join the team is to volunteer. Luckily for them, they ride in some of the most badass vehicles on the planet, designed to sustain blasts somewhere in the range between that of a plasma grenade and an Age Of Quarrel mushroom cloud. Force Protection, Inc out of South Carolina, “has become the nation’s leading center for blast protection technology and research to counter improvised explosive devices.” As a tribute to our troops, the dangerous work they do, and the awe-inspiring design of the vehicles they depend on, we present to you a look at Force Protection’s product line.


Nick of Tim: Stick to Your Guns


Annals of Headgear


“I love college,” the songwriter Asher Roth said so very long ago. And we laughed.

But you know, I really do. I treasure the rich experience of my higher education, and looking back, don’t miss for much. Still, when I gaze upon these hats, I see the thousands of collegiate careers I have, do and will live out in alternate universes. Like that one where I’m a Gamecock. Or the one where I go to Tulane. There’s one where I get serious about swimming instead of hanging out in the parking lot with the exchange students. But here I am, and there you are — wouldn’t you agree that these dimensionally-restrictive, linear lifetimes can be an awful drag? With only crude links to the all-seeing, all-experiencing, multi-dimensional consciousness of my being, I’m left here with but fleshen nostalgia and a wish to rock all the gear, to nap on all those quads… to tear down the uprights at Wisconsin, to wake up at six in the morning for two-a-days at Hobart, etc. So for now, these jpeg mosaics will have to do.

You see, I’m not much of a “hat guy”1 anymore, but my feelers out in the Junk Hustle current went all a-twitter the other day, and I found the mother lode in eBay seller inyourcourtsports’ items. The hats pictured, which were manufactured by The Game Headwear in the ’90s, are to me the epitome of college athletic and aesthetic cool. They say everything in plain letters with only a couple thin, colored lines on a (usually) white 35/65 blend. It’s a classic design — try finding one that looks bad. Heck, just try finding one. You can’t.

Here you’ll find a sampling of what is out there, along with our thoughts on some of the more striking specimens.



  1. I'm certainly no Shorts Guy. But who is? Well, this one guy, in Central Jersey, who wears shorts in the winter. I forget his name, but he played JV Hockey at Holy Cross and if you call his dad and ask for Shorts Guy, you'll reach him.
  2. Yea boi.
  3. Full name Young Alex of Bite.
  4. Proline status, so just a footnote.
  5. Strength, loyalty.

Nick of Tim: No Way Out

Into the fold we welcome Nate Turbow, with his Nick of Tim funny. It has been said this young DJ was run out of Cleveland years ago for his involvement with a deviant underground newsletter known as RIGAMAROLE, and we’re pretty sure this is true. Be that as it may, the scritch-scratching of his quill is enjoyed by many through his Dreaming and Scheming site, and can now be found within the pages of Trumbull Magazine/Trumbull Island. Spiritually daunting, romantically obtuse, and politically magnetic, his work is executed with a poignancy unparalleled in contemporary art and media. He was once quoted as saying, “If God wanted me to do something with my life he/she wouldn’t have invented drugs and women.”
"No Way Out"

Molly & Sam

One night Gerri F. Baby1 introduced me to Jaramay Aref, and Molly and Sam.

Molly & Sam


  1. Gerri the runaway from New Hampshire, muse to Ryan McGinley, a.k.a. doing shit like this. Always pleased as punch to see Gerri, who never has a phone but always a girlfriend.